When I see results it gets worse

Ok so I'm in the middle of a big struggle, I don't condone EDs but hey in this day and age the percentage is high amount men and woman... My fight is for myself I could care less of what others think but it's like I owe it to myself and can only be internally happy if I reach a certain expectation.
A great friend of mine said it best in her blog that writing and talking about it is the best therapy there is, plus to me it's a way from hopefully not going too far!
I've also started using an app that tracks weight, food, drink and exercise.. Lol it tells me I eat too little and workout to much but sadly that only increases my goals and keeps me trying for more.

I've never taken pictures like this but for at least therapy reasons it a decent idea, so an old photo and a couple from the morning on my transition I feel very happy today but hell why not I feel so light today!